The Trio & Me

From trauma to triumph

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For almost forty years, my life was shaped by trauma — the kind that settles into your bones and teaches you to survive instead of live. But survival is not the end of the story. Not mine, and not my children’s. This blog begins in the year before I turn forty, the year I finally decided to change the ending. I made a choice: To right what I could, release what I couldn’t, and rebuild what was broken. To stop shrinking from my own life and start shaping it. To heal — deeply, honestly, and fully — not just for me, but for my three children who have walked through every storm beside me. They are my reasons to rise. My three small suns in a sky that has seen too many clouds.

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  • 40 Things to do – Before I turn 40 (6)

    40 Things to do – Before I turn 40 (6)

    6. Be part of all of the kids big milestones this year This year feels big for all of us. Not just in small, everyday ways – but in the kind of moments that mark change, growth, and the quiet realisation that time is moving forward whether we’re ready or not. For our little family,…

  • 40 things to do – Before I turn 40 (5)

    40 things to do – Before I turn 40 (5)

    5. Celebrate Mia’s journey into adulthood Parenting has never felt straightforward to me. There was no example of what healthy parenting looked like, no guidance to fall back on, and no reassurance to quiet the constant, underlying fear that I wasn’t doing enough. That fear has followed me into motherhood. It has shown up as…

  • 40 Things to do – Before I turn 40 (4)

    40 Things to do – Before I turn 40 (4)

    4. Prioritise Me! As part of my “40 things to do before I turn 40,” one of the very first intentions I set for myself was something that sounds simple, but feels incredibly complex when I try to put it into practice – and that is learning how to truly prioritise me. Between working full-time…

  • 40 things to do – Before I turn 40 (3)

    40 things to do – Before I turn 40 (3)

    3. Travel to a different country Travelling once felt like a luxury that didn’t belong to me. As a young single mum, it was something I quietly tucked away under “maybe one day.” I had big dreams of seeing the world, but the reality was very different. We rarely made it out of our town—let…

  • 40 things to do – Before I turn 40 (2)

    40 things to do – Before I turn 40 (2)

    2. Teach my children about charities that mean something to me and our family! I was 16 years old when I was kicked out of home. After years of trauma, abuse, and experiences that are still hard to put into words, I suddenly found myself without a place to go. No safety net. No family…

  • 40 things to do – Before I Turn 40 (1)

    40 things to do – Before I Turn 40 (1)

    1. Start and finish a project In mid-2025, after 2 years in therapy, I was diagnosed with ADHD, Autism, and CPTSD (Complex Post Traumatic Stress) and cumulative childhood trauma. A mixed bag of tricks, really. Labels that, on one hand, offered clarity… and on the other, opened a door I wasn’t entirely prepared to walk…

  • Three Reasons to Rise

    After almost forty years of trauma, I am starting to learn what it means to rise. The year before I turn forty, something inside me shifted. A quiet voice — one I’d ignored for decades — whispered that it was time to right the wrongs, to mend what had been broken, and to build the…